is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
