Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
Randomize
