Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
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