it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
Randomize