why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
Then you guys just all showered together...?
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
Randomize
