Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
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