also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
Randomize
