Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
Randomize
