I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
Randomize
