Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
Send help, water and tortillas.
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
Randomize
