Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize
