All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
Banned from zoo.
Again?
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
Hey this is your roommate. You know the one that let you have sex with her while you called out your exs name and cried?
I have no recollection of that. You must have the wrong number. P.s. your thongs still on the ceiling fan.
Randomize
