while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
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