I should be sponsored by Trojan
operation harelip BJ is a go
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
Randomize