party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
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