I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
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