Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
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