Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
Welp, just took a tab of acid and cracked one of three bottles of champagne... Mondays ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
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