There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
Randomize
