they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
Randomize