someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
Randomize
