she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize