what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
Randomize
