Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
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