Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
A university police officer just hhigh fived me when i drunkenly stumbled into Aderhold. Fucking 5 o'clock somewhere.ITS IN CASABLANCA RIGHT NOW! TIME ZONES!
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
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