love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
So I went home with some chick last night... I'm not sue what's worse: not getting a nut at 5am, the condom breaking and not being replaced, feeling poo when I put my finger in her but, sleeping on a heroin mattress in her living room, her swine flu coughing fit at 7am or realizing she peed the matt at 10am. Actually it was probably the fact that she continuously told me she was the classiest girl in boulder.
What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
Randomize
