I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
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