i don't like sucking hair
when i say i joined a midget dating site why do u assume i was drunk
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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