a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
Randomize
