he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
Randomize
