I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
the condom got lost in my hair
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
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