why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
