these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
Randomize