And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
And despite my lack of successful relationships I'm a fucking guru
That's like claiming you're a good coach but going 2-12 last season
Randomize
