just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
Woke up next to my vibrator and a recipe for fudge brownies. If that doesn't scream I NEED TO GET LAID, then I don't know what else could.
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