help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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