My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
Randomize
