wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
new low: my hungover self just mistook bacon grease for mashed potatoes. worst. mistake. ever.
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
Randomize
