Duck Duck Cougar?
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Randomize
