you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Randomize
