you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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