Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
my drunk step mom just informed me my dad likes reverse cowgirl. Please god kill me.
I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
Randomize
