whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
Randomize
