You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
i used baking grease as lip gloss
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
Randomize
