I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize
