plz talk dirty to me
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
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