help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
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