It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
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