your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
Randomize
