no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
Randomize