I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
Remembering you have vodka in the freezer gives the same surge of happiness as finding 20 bucks in a coat pocket.
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
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