Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
I am in a vortex of obligation.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
Randomize
