i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
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